Matthew 6 & 7: Delight in Your Spouse

Sincere Prayer

Matthew 6:5-7

5 And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.

6 But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly.

7 But when ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as the heathen do: for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking.

The main reward of the hypocrites (footnote: pretenders or play actors) is to be seen of men. That's what they want and that's what they get. Doesn't seem so bad, right? They receive the recognition and praise they desire. But the rewards our Father in Heaven has in store for us are infinitely better than that. To be concerned with the opinions of the world is to lose sight of heaven.

I like the note in the manual that "vain repetitions" can mean insincerity. Even the Lord's prayer could become a vain repetition if said without feeling and meaning. During my study, I broke down each verse to see what we can learn about how to pray, and not necessarily what to say. Here's what I got:

1. Heavenly Father's name is sacred and I should take it seriously. I shouldn't misuse it throughout my daily life and I shouldn't rush through it when beginning a prayer. The same applies to the name of Jesus Christ.
2. My intentions must be in line with His and I need to be willing to surrender my will.
3. I can ask for my needs. Doing so shows humility and also reminds me that I depend on Him for everything.
4. I can seek to know my weaknesses and ask Him what I lack. I should also acknowledge my sins and ask for forgiveness. He can help me reach "perfection" or completeness (eventually). I need His help knowing what to change.
5. I need to ask for His help to conquer the devil in my life. I should be specific about what I'm struggling with.

The idea of slowing down while praying struck me. I'm guilty of rushing, especially the beginning and end of my prayers - and that's when I say these beautiful, important names! As I studied, I realized that I'm willing to spend quality time with so many people. For example, I don't rush through time with my husband because I love him and enjoy being with him. Shouldn't it be the same with God? I want to spend time with Him. Prayer is so much more than a to-do list item. I don't think our rewards are as great if we just want to check it off. Sure, we'll be blessed for trying, but the great reward is developing a relationship with God. We can't do that if we're in a hurry.

What is your treasure?

Matthew 6:19-21

19 Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal:

20 But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal:

21 For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.

It's up to us to decide what our "treasure" is. For me, it's the gospel and my family, and I'm trying to teach my children how to focus on heavenly things. Drew and I are very careful about where we keep and invest our money. It's common for us to discuss the interest rates of our accounts and how we can best prepare for our future. We need to invest in our eternal salvation, too. It's far more important than our financial health.

We can invest in eternity through our service to God and His kingdom. Sometimes the gospel feels like a big sacrifice of time and effort, but we will have our reward. Much like there are financial rules and laws of mathematics, there are also eternal laws and blessings. We can't comprehend the scope of eternity and what salvation with Heavenly Father will be like. We will have all that He has if we invest wisely.

Doctrine and Covenants 82:10

10 I, the Lord, am bound when ye do what I say; but when ye do not what I say, ye have no promise.

He is bound. We can count on that. Even if that wasn't the case, He would bestow all blessings possible on us anyway because He wants us to have them. But we can't receive them if we're walking around with our figurative umbrella up, stopping us from receiving the rain. Keeping our covenants and sacrificing for Him opens us up to receive all He has.

This page on the Church's website has a great overview of the covenants we make during the temple endowment and how they bless our lives. I'd encourage you to review those covenants and ponder what you can do to improve and utilize the blessings that are yours.

JST, Matthew 6:25–27

25 And, again, I say unto you, Go ye into the world, and care not for the world; for the world will hate you, and will persecute you, and will turn you out of their synagogues.

26 Nevertheless, ye shall go forth from house to house, teaching the people; and I will go before you.

27 And your heavenly Father will provide for you, whatsoever things ye need for food, what ye shall eat; and for raiment, what ye shall wear or put on.

JST, Matthew 6:38

38 Wherefore, seek not the things of this world but seek ye first to build up the kingdom of God, and to establish his righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.

The equation for eternal salvation is pretty simple when expressed this way. As long as we're seeking Him and His kingdom first, choosing the right treasures, and keeping our priorities straight, we will have what we need. Care not for the world. I know that's easier said than done, but it's the key to joy. What can you do to care less about the world and more about God?

Matthew 6

34 Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.

I've always loved this verse. It alleviates a lot of my anxiety. Yes, it's good to be prepared for the future and know how you'd handle hard situations. I'm all about brainstorming and preparing good mindsets. But sometimes I worry a lot about things I have no control over. It's more productive for me to focus on what I can to today, or even just this moment, and then turn the rest over to God and His will. He knows best and will make everything for my good in the end.

Delight in Your Spouse

Matthew 7

12 Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets.

I noticed that a footnote for this verse says "Marriage, Continuing Courtship in." Isn't that interesting? When I followed that footnote to the topical guide, I found a few lovely thoughts, including loving your spouse with all your heart, being benevolent, honoring your spouse, and delighting in your spouse.

Delighting? I adore that concept. We can all apply this counsel individually, but I'll share my ideas. When we delight in our spouses, we see their merits more than their flaws ... and that's also what we share with others. I do not support or participate in husband bashing. I wouldn't want my husband talking about me that way. This verse could easily be rephrased as: whatsoever ye would that your spouse should say about you, say ye even so about them.

Delighting and honoring our spouse means that we speak kindly of them and give them respect even when times are hard. It means we remember our times together with fondness and give them the benefit of the doubt when it's necessary. It means forgiving mistakes. Most importantly, delighting is acknowledging that our spouses are different people than we are and loving and accepting them for it. 

Most of you know that my husband and I are very different people, but I truly delight in all he is. I love his sense of humor and how he brightens even our darkest times. I love his fearlessness and his tenacity. He makes jokes that would never leave my mouth, but that's how he connects with people and he does so much good because of it. We have plenty of disagreements, but in the end, we assume that we both have good intentions and then sort things out the best we can. I love telling people about him and his endeavors. My heart melts when I watch him with our children. We laugh together every day. I delight in him.

Matthew 7:3-5

3 And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?

4 Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye?

5 Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother’s eye.

A beam totally blocks our vision. When we have a beam in our eye, we really only know what's inside ourselves, and sometimes that's icky. This applies to marriage as well as other things. When I don't deal with my own flaws and inner struggles, my marriage suffers. When I pick apart what my husband does without acknowledging my own imperfections, I create an unfair and bitter environment. There is no delight when I can't see beyond myself.

When arguments or other problems arise, it's helpful to be introspective and see if we have a beam blocking our own vision or perception of the situation. Give it a try next time - with your spouse, at work, at church, anywhere you become frustrated with someone. Pray for additional insight to help you see things clearly. When we see through the Lord's eyes, it's much easier to find peace.

Bonnie Gwyn